Raising your voice!

Ok...so I struggle with this a bit. It seems like it is the only way to get Jack to "hear" me. Its unfortunate. I do not want to raise my voice...I don't want to be "that" Mom. But how do I get Jack to listen?
Example..."No Jack please leave Kita's bowls"...distract...take him into next room and give him a toy...play for a second with him. Cool..it worked...go back to trying to make breakfast/lunch/dinner whatever. But..no there goes Jack back to the bowls...this time to drop the toy into it. Again..."no Jack please don't touch..bad" still in a super calm but firm voice. Jack throws a fit...and sometimes attempts to hit me in the face.
Stay calm...walk him over to the toy area...good boy...play with your toys. Nope...there he goes back to the bowls...so I lift them up...place them on the counter...say in loud voice....NO Jack...bad!
So we have accomplished nothing except that...I have now shouted at him...and removed the one item that HAS to stay on the floor in order to get him NOT to touch it. And this has been happening since he could crawl over to the bowls. So as you can imagine..by the third time to the bowl....my voice is fairly loud and super firm. Therefore most times we just simply remove the bowls every time Jack is awake and downstairs. Not fair to Kita...and not really teaching him boundaries.

I do not want to shout at him...I do not want him to A. think that it is OK to talk to someone like this. and B. think that this is how to get your POINT across to the other person.
I am going to make a SUPER CONSCIOUS effort to stop this. Now that Jack is "talking" I notice that he kind of does so in this loud..sort of shouting voice. He spits out these short one syllable very loud "words" we will call them. Perhaps this is how he thinks that you will "be heard"..because when Mommy really wants me to "hear" her she shouts at me. Yikes...is it too late to correct this. I hope not! After all its not like this happens all the time.

Talking

Jack really seems to be "talking" a lot lately. He will point and say things to us...
A few examples.
today we were in the car and I was pointing out the window at airplanes and he would look, and it was clear he could see them. Then I turned to look at him and hew would point, say something - unclear but to him it was something...and then he kind of nodded a bit towards where he was pointing. So funny, it exactly what I do when I ask him to look at something!
Then when he Daddy and I were looking at his Elmo Out & About Book...where you push a button on the book and it asks you to "find something blue"...and he would point (not at something blue) and say he wa wa wa or ba ba ba. Then push the button again and do the same thing.

Potty Again

He seems to think he is supposed to "get in" the potty! lol





There's that fork again!

June 24th

He sat on the potty AGAIN!! I just went back into the washroom....Jack right behind me, and Alex the monkey whom I brought to sit down on the potty in case Jack wouldn't. Well I was wrong he took Alex off the potty and ...well...first tried to climb into the potty (I brought my phone/camera with me this time!!), and then I put the potty bowl back onto the seat, and sat him on it! and he stayed for a sec, got up, sat back down, got up, sat back down, and then turned sideways on the seat and kind of got stuck in this position, I helped him move his leg and he got up and sat down again!!!! I am so excited...this could be the beginning of something special!!

Hitting

Sat June 19th.

I was at a play-date the other day Jack hit another boy…gently…however he hit him, for no reason. (It was not the first time – twice before he has done it) I picked him up immediately and said NO Jack NO hitting.

I don’t think he does it with aggression…actually I know he doesn’t. I think he is looking for a reaction from the other baby. He also likes to tap and touch other babies on their face and head. He is just at a stage where he is curious about exploring interactions, touching, expression etc.

I found the info below helpful. In reading this article I realize that I gave Jack attention first and then the other baby. And perhaps the attention Jack gets when he hits the other baby is somewhat “rewarding”. When this occurs again I will definitely give the “victim” (don’t like the way this sounds as my baby Jack is not doing this with aggression or anger towards the other baby) attention first and ask Jack to hug him/her better.

Your toddler's violence always demands an immediate response. Don't ever ignore acts of aggression by your toddler (or by other toddlers who might be visiting for a playdate). Violence cannot be condoned. If you ignore it, your child will think it's okay. So respond quickly and clearly to hitting, kicking, scratching, hair pulling, poking, pushing, biting, and throwing things.

Whenever your toddler hurts another child, go to the other child and offer comfort first, even before you discipline your own child. Correcting violence is not simply a matter of disciplining your child and teaching her right from wrong. It also is an opportunity to model empathetic, caring, and compassionate behavior toward others. So make sure that your toddler sees you offering comfort to the victim. In time, she will begin to emulate your behavior.

While offering comfort to the injured child, clearly state to your own toddler that hurting another person is not allowed. Show your child the teeth marks or scratches or bruises on the child she victimized. Point out the injured child's tears and tell your toddler what they mean: that your child hurt the other. Finally, proscribe the specific violent behavior of your child: "No biting—ever!" or "Hitting is never allowed!"

For full article click on link below
http://life.familyeducation.com/discipline/toddler/53391.html

June 22, 2010
Jack can officially open the door to the downstairs washroom! Daddy says that he has done this a few times already…however this is the first time I have witnessed it myself!
There is a “Jack potty” in there that I am trying to get him to sit on when I use the washroom...this….well… still a no go. We will continue to try and ask him to sit on his potty when we sit on the big “potty”- and I will continue to talk my way through the steps of going to “the potty” and inviting him to sit on his potty until one day he decides to try it his own. Up until today…he was more interested in shutting the door while you are in there, and finally today opening the door! Perhaps now that this is mastered “the door” he will be motivated or inclined to try the potty.

June 24th
Jack sat on the potty today!!!!!!!!! Yeaaaaaay. FINALLY. I moved the potty back down to the main floor (where we usually are during the day) washroom (from his washroom upstairs), at the end of last week and I have been walking him through the steps of going to the washroom…from taking down pants to washing hands…and am I constantly saying “Mommy is going to the potty” as he always follows me right into the washroom – and then usually ends up shutting and then trying to open the door. Well, as he mastered that two days ago….today he actually sat on the potty!!!! So fun….big step for us. Jack NEVER EVER sits down unless he is strapped into his high chair, car seat or stroller! Next we will attempt the morning “poo poop on the potty”. Its just not always consistent…however it is obvious when he is having a BM.
For now….for the rest of this week…I think we will stick to sitting on the potty.

(I actually keep a log book as I dont always have time to enter things onto blog (slow computer!).

hugs

Jack is a very sweet boy....it may look like he is choking his little friend....but its a hug!

A bit of background

So here we are...Jack is one years old! wow did that year ever go by fast. So many milestones have come and gone...I am almost forgetting when things happened exactly! I will give a brief recap of Jack's milestones to get you caught up.
First 3 months we figured out how to nurse when to nurse and worked hard to set a sleep schedule.
3 months - first laugh
4 months rolled over
5 months started crawling
6 months said dada
6 months sitting(yep, crawled before he sat)
6 months started eating solids
8 months pulling self on furniture
8 months cruising along furniture
8 months clapping
8 months peek a boo (this was his favourite game for about 2 months)
9 months first tooth
9 months said keeya (for Kita our dog - still no Mama)
10 months taking a few steps on his own
10 months and 3 weeks walking!
11 months stopped nursing
12 months he is attempting to climb everything - can climb out of bath tub if I am there for him to grab a hold of
12 months - 1 week, mastered sitting on his little push cars and bikes, still unable to move himself along while he is on them.
Pushes Mr. Bear (his closest companion) and other things on the bikes and push cars as well.
Standing on his tippy toes and can reach things that are on the dining room table and allllllmost reach objects on the edge of the counter if they are slightly hanging over the edge!
Jack loves to "pretend feed" Mommy and Daddy and Mr. Bear with his pretend dishes. I gave him a set of plates, forks, knives, cups and some plastic food which he took to right away. He loves the forks. He has been carrying them around for the past two weeks. He really wants to try and eat with them - but it is super messy so I am not ready to let this happen yet. I will buy him a real fork with silver prongs and see how he does with those. (I know I should be encouraging him to eat with cutlery- a bit too messy at this time). Perhaps in the next two weeks we will be ready for it.
He has mastered sliding down off our Mommy and Daddy's bed - I showed him a few weeks back how to get down off the bed and couch (turning around and sliding down on tummy) and well this week he started doing it on his own!